Lesson 88 Trapped in a mine
Why is the rescue taking so long?
Six men have been trapped in a mine for seventeen hours.
If they are not brought to the surface soon they may lose their lives.
However, rescue operations are proving difficult. If explosives are used,
vibrations will cause the roof of the mine to collapse. Rescue workers are
therefore drilling a hole on the north side of the mine. They intend to bring
the men up in a special capsule. If there had not been a hard layer of rock
beneath the soil, they would have completed the job in a few hours. As it is,
they have been drilling for sixteen hours and they still have a long way to go.
Meanwhile, a microphone, which was lowered into the mine two hours ago,
has enabled the men to keep in touch with their closest relatives. Though
they are running out of food and drink, the men are cheerful and confident
that they will get out soon. They have been told that rescue operations are
progressing smoothly. If they knew how difficult it was to drill through the hard
rock, they would lose heart.
Lesson 89 A slip of the tongue
Who made the only funny joke that evening and why?
People will do anything to see a free show -- even if it is a bad one.
When the news got round that a comedy show would be presented at our local cinema
by the P. and U. Bird Seed Company, we all rushed to see it. We had to queue for hours
to get in and there must have been several hundred people present just before the
show began. Unfortunately, the show was one of the dullest we have ever seen.
Those who failed to get in need not have felt disappointed, as many of the artistes
who should have appeared did not come. The only funny things we heard that evening
came from the advertiser at the beginning of the programme. He was obviously
very nervous and for some minutes stood awkwardly before the microphone.
As soon as he opened his mouth, everyone burst out laughing. We all know what the
poor man should have said, but what he actually said was: 'This is the Poo and Ee
Seed Bird Company. Good ladies, evening and gentlemen!"
Lesson 90 What's for supper?
What kind of fish are they?
Fish and chips has always been a favourite dish in Britain, but as the oceans have
been overfished, fish has become more and more expensive. So it comes as a surprise
to learn that giant fish are terrifying the divers on North Sea oil rigs. Oil rigs have
to be repaired frequently and divers, who often have to work in darkness a hundred
feet under water, have been frightened out of their wits by giant fish bumping into them
as they work. Now they have had special cages made to protect them from these monsters.
The fish are not sharks or killer whales, but favourite eating varieties like cod and
skate which grow to unnatural sizes, sometimes as much as twelve feet in length.
Three factors have caused these fish to grow so large: the warm water round the hot
oil pipes under the sea; the plentiful supply of food thrown overboard by the crews
on the rigs, the total absence of fishing boats around the oil rigs. As a result, the fish
just eat and eat and grow and grow in the lovely warm water. Who eats who?